I think there are 2 main problems with expectations:
1) we have them – the idea behind is that if we have them we can preapre ourself better, we know what to expect so we feel safer and in general we don’t like risk, we can also influence external world to move towards fulfilling the expectations.
Yeah cool – but why they biggest reason to smile and be happy is usually something unexpected, totally out of the blue? mhm…
2) the way we create them – we incorporate our own experience, knowledge, support of others to build adjusted and very often how we call them realistic expectations – 2 problems about it
1. realistic means usually worse than our internal desire- which means we already give up on sth but we still expect a bit…does it really make sense? ok its like plan B, adjusting any plan because of changing environment but when we creat plan the goal stays, we just adjust the way of achieving it, when we change expectations do we adjust the way or the final goal :>
2. They are subjective – so yesterday at the train stations I met small mice, I don’t like rodents really, I can get really neurotic about insects, rodents etc, but the point is I was also in Asia where rats were running in the place we ate (of course not many and rarely but they did) and it was not a reason to stop the meal, to scream, to get panic. So why was it so stressful yesterday? Cause it happened in German, super cool organized Western European country.
And if I didnt have expectations towards what to see in Asia and what to see in europe the rad would always be rat and the sun a sun mhm…?!
So let’s see if life without expectations is possible and is it better or worse:>?